Top 5 CDs Not Sold in Stores

5) Living in the 90's-

Starting our list is the apparent "anything goes" attitude of 90's music with the compilation "Living in the 90's". Forget about the AIDS epidemic, the gulf war, and the Monica Lewinski sex scandal with this amazing collection! Pop in this two-CD or two-cassette mix and relish in the days when Shaquille O'Neil had a potential rap career that could rival Warren G's. This mix is unbelievable.... oh!

Highlights: I Gonna Be (500 Miles), Hold On, I'm Too Sexy

4) Jock Jams Vol 1-

The soundtrack to any major sporting event, Jock Jams has grown into five volumes over the years and each year the annoyance level increased two fold. Not only did this CD provide valuable time out music during breaks at High School Basketball games but it also became the anthem to a majority of cheerleading routines across the country. Pump up the jams indeed.

Highlights: Pump up the Jam, Hip Hop Hooray, Rock and Roll Part 2

3) Pure Moods-

Like the "Benedictine Monks" and the "O Brother Where Art Thou?" soundtrack "Pure Moods" struck a chord with middle-aged mothers who needed a casual escape from driving their kids to soccer practice. Although completely cheesy and lacks any artistic merit "Pure Moods" is the musical equivalent of a tranquilizer dart to the neck. Start a bath light some candles and pop this bad boy in the CD player.

Highlights: Return to Innocence, Orinoco Flow (Sail Away)

2) Time Life Series-

Time Magazine had a brilliant idea: "Let's buy the rights to a whole bunch of singles that no one listens to any more from the 50's, 60's, and 70's and make generations of Baby Boomers spend hundreds of dollars sitting in a nostalgic fueled flashback!" Time Life practically invented the not sold in stores CD and for this we give them props for the amount of material generated and the quality of the content.

Highlights: 70's Collection and the 50's Collection.

1) Monster Ballads-

"Every bad boy has a soft side" and this collection proves it. There are many guilty pleasures in life and one of them is 80's rock music. This compilation implies that these rock stars were real "bad boys" in the first place since they are showing their softer side. So it must be therapeutic for a rock star to write a ballad for that one chick he had sex with on tour right after having sex with another chick he met on tour. I don't know which is sadder the actual ballads on this album or the fact that one of these songs was used in a wedding ceremony in the 80's. Plus skydiving is bad ass!

Highlights: Every Rose Has Its Thorn, Almost Paradise, More Than Words