The 8 Worst Members of Superhero Teams

Dec. 16 3:11 PM by Aaron_Koehn

Every family has a black sheep, every class has a dunce, and every group of superheroes has a member who's operating a level far below their more talented teammates. The following 8 characters were the laughingstock of their respective groups, unable to prove their worth with their meager powers.

8-Aquaman from the Justice League

When you're a member of a team composed of Earth's greatest heroes, you ought to be pretty powerful as well, otherwise some ridicule might follow. And in the case of Aquaman, much ridicule seems to follow, usually preceding laughter and finger-pointing. These criticisms, however, are easily justified since blondie's superpowers consist of being able to talk to fish, and swimming well, while other members of his team are able to shoot frickn' laser beams from their eyes and freeze people with their ice-breath. If I didn't know any better, I'd say that Aquaman's mom (Aquamom?) probably talked to the other Justice League members' mothers imploring them to allow Aquaman membership since "he's been having a real tough time making new friends." Only Superman is able to count the number of times Justice League members have rolled their eyes during the course of Aquaman's "exploits."

7-Jubilee from the X-Men

If you had the choice of selecting any superpower imaginable, would you choose the ability to shoot fireworks out of your hands? If you answered yes, clearly you've already been blessed with superhuman intelligence. Still, Jubilee -- the firework-spewing superhero -- does have days when she's incredibly valuable, most notably when the nation celebrates its independence on the Fourth of July. Because you have not seen a Fourth of July extravaganza unless you've seen Jubliee shoot roman candles out of her fingers at an invading Doctor Doom. However, in the grand scheme of things, being able to shoot artillery shells out of your digits does beat writing snide internet blogs. Then again, yours truly isn't a member of the X-Men, so Jubilee, you're still the big loser.

6-Allan Quatermain from the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen

When one compiles a team of superheroes, it is very important to ensure that every member has superpowers. Otherwise you're not compiling a team of superheroes but just a team of heroes. The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen is a group comprised of four superpowered individuals, and one individual who is officially a senior citizen and recovering opium addict. Allan Quatermain is the said elderly, drug addict who boasts more liver spots than Jay Leno has cars. That's not to say, however, that individuals who have fallen onto tough times or who may have dealt with life's trails poorly are beyond use and rehabilitation. What we are saying is that if you ever find yourself in the midst of a tag-team wrestling match and you need to select a partner to tap in, you'd be a fool not to choose the wrestler who has superhuman abilities in favor of the one who recently celebrated his 60th birthday.

5-Bouncing Boy from the Legion of Superheroes

One will never gain any respect or admiration when his foremost ability consists of inflating his body size to the point of being morbidly obese and then bouncing. And for that reason, Bouncing Boy is placed on the bottom rung of a superhero team that is made up of individuals with some pretty questionable superpowers (you know who you are, Matter-Eater Lad and Chlorophyll Kid). It really shouldn't come as any surprise then, to see this husky hero voted least likely to succeed by his fellow superpowered peers, since his greatest nemesis is probably the thumb tack. But what is surprising is that in the past 47 years, DC hasn't yet killed off the Bouncing Boy. In fact, his rebounding adventures can now be seen in more formats than ever before, since the Kids' WB has adapted a Legion of Superheroes cartoon. Because if there's one lesson the children need to learn, it's that even if you're morbidly obese, you can still successfully fight crime.

4-Captain Metropolis from the Crimebusters

With the Crimebusters being largely composed of individuals without superpowers, you have to be pretty unremarkable to be seen as the weak link, and that's exactly what Captain Metropolis is: weak and unremarkable. During the extremely brief run of the Crimebusters (a short-lived superhero team in the graphic novel Watchmen), Captain Metropolis could be heard making disparaging remarks about many ethnic minorities, which proved to be somewhat hypocritical since he was gay. But it wasn't just his lack of intelligence, meager physique, lame uniform, perpetual whining, horrible leadership abilities, use of racial slurs, or poor team-naming abilities that made him such an unlikable character. No, the biggest reason for hating Captain Metropolis was the fact that he probably had to dye his hair in order to obtain that degree of bleached-out blonde, and it's difficult to be seen as tough when you're concerned about your roots showing.

3-Ma Ti (Heart) from the Planeteers

If you've got a wicked green mullet, you don't have to make apologies to anyone, especially not whiny little boys and girls who may not be happy with the power ring you distributed to them. And that's the case with Captain Planet and Ma Ti. If the world is ever in any sort of crisis, you can rest assured that a certain androgynous man-lady will be pointing his/her power ring at various living things and yelling "Heart!" followed by no observable changes in the situation. It has actually been rumored that perhaps Ma Ti's ring doesn't do anything and he was just given a plain band and told that he "had the power to manipulate life with love," so that he wouldn't continue to get in the hair of the Planeteers will the real power rings. Even if his ring can manipulate animals with his good-natured feelings, what good will controlling that monkey do if a tidal wave is crashing down on a large city?

2-Bumblebee from the Transformers

Bumblebee is essentially the child form of a certain faction of robots who are in disguise. His role in this transforming robot squad seems akin to the annoying little brother who is constantly trying to mimic his older siblings -- usually unsuccessfully -- and there is more than one instance where you can actually see Optimus Prime changing his diapers (note: robot diaper-changing scene may have been made up). Besides being the smallest, weakest, and most annoying Transformer, he also takes on the form of a non-American automobile (Volkswagen Bug), and if there's one thing we know about those Europeans, it's that they don't like, and aren't very good at, fighting. In Bumblebee's defense, he does get really good gas mileage, so if you're ever considering taking a cross-country trip in one of the Transformers, it would be wise to go with Bumblebee.

1-Snarf from the Thundercats

You're either a narcissistic maniac or a complete fool if you finish every sentence you say by proclaiming your own name, and Snarf is most likely the latter. However, nobody said it was easy being on a team of muscle-bound, jungle cats when you're only three feet tall, and Snarf knew what he was getting into when he signed up for this group, so we shouldn't feel too sorry for this cat, lizard, creature-thing. Ultimately, Snarf has many other practical uses even if he isn't the best warrior. For example, he can cook the meals for the team after they come home from a tough day of evil-plot-stopping. Or maybe he can clean up the communal litterbox. Just as long as he stays the hell out of combat, it's cool.

These related lists ain't like Aquaman. They're just as strong as this one!

7 Weird Superheros Who Won't Ever Hit the Silver Screen (But Should)

The 7 Most Pathetic Supervillians in Cinematic History

11 Action Heroes that Deserve their Own Game

9 Comic Series Almost as Awesome as Watchmen


Ma Ti was the lamest member of a group of losers. Heart FTL.


Ok, up unitl now I thought I was the only person (other than non-comic book fans) to think Jubilee was lame. This is why I like you guys.


Snarf snarf. Haha. Great list.


i think jubilee is kind of cool. little winey but overall ok. my favorite x-men is gambit. i wonder why he wasnt in any of the movies though. snarf is gay. so are most of the people on this list. in movie bumble bee was the shit though.


bouncing boy hahaha.

my list I would of probably put arther the moth from the tic.

Useless moth lol


The only disagreement with this list is Jubilee. I mean, there's Morph who was basically an uncool version of Mystique. There's Angel, who basically can only glide (granted, this stopped once he became Archangel, but Jubilee grew past her useless stage too.) Oh yeah, what about that Cypher guy? He could speak languages and he got shot and died.


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